If you can’t teach your child basic respect, it’s probably better if you don’t send him over to my house.
My son has one friend who has very little respect for anyone and their possessions. Right after I renovated my entire downstairs, I found this kid putting together Lego sets and then throwing them against my newly painted walls. MM was home that day and sent this boy home and explained that he could return once he learns to respect other people’s things. This boy was humiliated by his actions and said he’d be more respectful next time he came over. I thought that lesson would be enough to teach this boy right from wrong in my house. But no.
During the summer, this same boy got mouthy with me while he was playing with my son in the front yard. He was hitting baseballs across the street, into the neighbours yard, and I nicely asked him to go to the park to hit baseballs so he doesn’t break anyone’s windows. He defiantly shook his head and said, “nah.” And then he hit another one. To which I replied, “maybe I should just send you home early if you’re not going to listen.” He didn’t hit another baseball for the rest of the day.
A while later, the boys went inside the house while I cleaned the back yard. It was about half an hour before dinner when I went inside to cook. When I got to the kitchen, I saw this boy sitting at my kitchen table with a smorgasbord of food in front of him – my son was nowhere to be found. I asked this kid where my son was and he said my son was downstairs playing video games. Then I said, “did you ask if you could raid my fridge and cupboards right before dinner?” He smiled charmingly and shook his head. I gathered all the food in my arms and put it back then said to the boy, “it’s really rude to go through other people’s kitchens without asking. Do NOT do that again. If you want something, you ask first.” When I texted his mom about it, gently explaining that he probably wouldn’t eat dinner because he raided my kitchen, she laughed it off and texted back, “it’s just because he feels comfortable at your house. Lol.” No apology for his rude behaviour, no remorse, nothing. SHE LAUGHED IT OFF.
Most recently, the other day, him and my son came in from playing outside. Again, this same kid walked into my house with his muddy shoes on (here in Canada we take our shoes off at the door) and sat down on my front room carpet (I have cream coloured carpet). Just as I was about to tell him to please take his shoes off, he did it before I could say anything. And then he threw his shoes across my house, hitting the wall near the front door. I called out to him and told him never to throw things across my house again. And then he laughed at me. Kind of like his mom did when he raided my fridge without asking.
Even my son has expressed that he’s embarrassed by his friends behaviour. And he’s refrained from asking this boy to come over again because this kids disrespect drives my son crazy. My son knows the rules when he goes to other people’s houses and he gets angry at his friends when they don’t respect our rules.
I haven’t seen this boy in a couple months and I’ll admit, I’m not that upset about it. He’s the only kid that pushes my buttons because I feel like I constantly have to parent him. Isn’t this something that his parents should be doing so he doesn’t act like a little animal at other people’s houses??
It makes me wondering what the fuck goes on at their house. And then I realize, I don’t want to know.
My house, my rules. Simple.